Three things are bound to happen after reading this post:

  1.  Your libido takes a big hit and that will be good news as there isn’t enough flour to make more pizza for the next 5 generations.
  2. You will be fed up and finally secure a gym membership form
  3. Errmmmhh… None of these happen and you learn something new.

Just skip to the next paragraph already!

On today’s episode of Myth Busters, we explore the popular myth: Sex burns a lot of calories. Sex is nice I heard. Of all the ways to burn calories, some people enjoy sexercise as a form of total work out.

man and woman doing the sex strokes gif
Swing it! Picture courtesy Pinterest

Sexercise :
Hyper-energetic and prolonged copulation that with repetition counts as a full cardiovascular workout regime leading to increased aerobic capacity and six-pack abdomen which in turn leads to more workout opportunities…..
George “TSB” Clooney March 12, 2007

Urban Dictionary

As much as this form of workout sounds promising, there is good and bad news.

  • The bad news is  – Sex doesn’t burn as many calories as you think.
  • The Good news – Much of the calories that can be burned depend on a variety of factors -which includes your weight, sex and how vigorous the romp is!

THE SEX RESEARCH

In 2013, a bunch of “sex enthusiast” scientists at the University of Montreal decided to put this myth to rest. They brought 21 heterosexual couples together and placed trackers on them which monitored how many calories they burnt during lovemaking and compared the results to that which they burnt while running on the treadmill. The results were shocking!

The men burnt around 100 calories while the women burnt around 69 calories. Now, just so you know, the results were based on lovemaking that lasted an average of 25 minutes.

You read that right! 25 minutes! Wowzers! I know you are recounting how long your last one lasted. Oops! Don’t freak out yet. Before you start wondering if that time included foreplay, yes it did.
How did they fare on actual exercise? Well, they burnt 276 calories from running on the treadmill for 30 minutes. #goals

The researchers estimated men burnt roughly 4.2 calories per minute while women 3.1 calories per minute.  Care to know how many calories you will burn from your next sexual encounter? Multiply 4.2 calories and 3.1 calories by the number of minutes of sex if you are a man or woman respectively.
What’s more, research also showed sex positions had an impact on the calories burnt.

According to TheCut’s interview with personal trainer Charlene Ciardiello, CEO of fitness program Shut Up and Move, these are the approximated number of calories burned during 30 minutes in some of the most common sex positions (selected from a survey).

Missionary

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Lookie here, piranhas get busy too! Picture courtesy Marshable

In this classical position, Ciardiello estimates the man on top will burn 143 calories while the woman at the bottom will burn only 44 calories.

Doggy

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During penetration, a woman in doggy style will burn 98 calories as being on all fours works the glutes and quadriceps.
A man in this position will burn 151 calories and even that can boost up to 211 calories by speeding up the tempo.


Legs Up

A woman in this position will burn 116 calories while the man burns 127 calories.

Cowgirl

A man lying flat on his back burns zero calories during this position, while the woman on top will burn 122 calories. Wheew!

giphy-2
You won’t burn nothing lying down like a dead fish!

You can read on more of other positions by checking out TheCut’s interview with Ciardiello. If you are probably clueless what these positions are, open google type in there and kindly don’t forget to turn “Safe Search” on, for the love of Heavens.

Fun Fact:

Though we’re not suggesting it, sex with a forbidden mate may also increase your calorie burn. One study in the European Heart Journal found that 75% of sudden deaths from a heart attack during sex involved an extramarital partner. Exciting sex seems to crank your heart rate more than a run-of-the-mill romp, and so may provide a better workout.

the Times-NEWs

So guys, next time, you decide to do-the-do, flash out your calculator and punch 4.2 or 3.1 by the romp minutes. If the actual number of calories burnt isn’t encouraging, you probably should resort to “Option 2” in the opening paragraph.

Verdict:

barechested and ripped!

Did you ever think you would get a ripped body like this from fornicating? Stick to light walking or hit the gym! Stay safe, STIs are real! Cheers!